DOGGONE IT!

It was windy and cool, not really the perfect day for busking, but still a perfect day in the park for trees to bud, the geese to gather, and people to walk their dogs. Just ten minutes into my thrumming and harping inside the Queen Elizabeth II Gardens, in the riparian zone close to where Her Majesty is always riding to nowhere while seated high upon her horse, a rather ragged looking gentleman, very tall and wearing very loud red and yellow blowing-in-the-wind sailing clothes, stopped walking his dog to have a chat with me.

Fittingly and amusingly, he introduced himself as “Barber.” My inner self chuckled as his foot-long unkempt and scruffy beard was quite the distraction to anything he was attempting to communicate to me. He was mumbling something about the election (we had just gone to the polls the day before, the politer still on front lawns and park billboards), but I was not listening. The distraction of his unsightly and knotty beard was quickly eclipsed by his dog defecating on my buskspot. With nary a look nor a word regarding this action of his pooch, Barber simply bid goodbye and walked away leaving the poop at my feet. 

Rather roiled, I wasn’t sure what to do. Just leave it and change buskspots? Confront Barber?  Bag it and deposit into the nearest trash can? With my iPhone, take a picture of Barber and his Fido and show it to the nearest park sheriff? Or bag it, and follow Barber to his residence and deposit it there?

For me to just leave it and move on would have been the simplest action, whereas confronting Barber was a bit more complicated. Here is what I know about confronting someone over anything. Anyone you decide to confront is always a wild card. Confronting Barber could predictively lead to a shouting match or even fisticuffs. 

But for me to bag it and deposit it into a park garbage can, yuk. Not my dog’s poop – I do not own a dog for this very reason. I’ve no quarrel with people and their pets, but having a pet is just not for me. Too much maintenance for my already imaginary busy schedule. Besides, I do not need a dog for an excuse to go for a walk in the park. This I do daily, without a dog, and with or without my guitar.

For me to bag it and follow Barber to his place and dump it there, though sinister in nature, would certainly be the most delicious poetic justice. Hmmm. But I would have to take time out of my busy busking schedule and in a most aggressive way, take a chance of confronting the wildcard.

After the fact, I googled the appropriate by law. According to my city Good Neighbor Guide:

“Picking up after your dog, be this on private property or public property, is part of responsible pet ownership. On public property, immediately dispose of your dog’s waste. Dog poop poses environmental risks health hazards, carrying diseases and parasites harmful to humans and other animals. Noncompliance of this can result in fines ranging from $100 to $300.”

Hmmm. Reading all this is good to know but to point out and preach about this to a dog walker who is guilty of not picking up after their pooch is a risky business, and such confrontation could potentially lead to a disastrous outcome.

I googled the breed of Barber’s Rover. It was a Newfoundland, and this Newfoundland left quite a load of poop.

Call me a coward – I left it and moved on. 

Doggone it! 

Doggy do does take the fun out of busking!